"Maybe if you go to bed you’ll feel better in the morning" is literally just the human version of "Have you tried turning it off and back on again?"
my chemistry teacher calls babies “fresh humans”
This is not a pug. It’s actually the world’s most annoying alarm clock.
He’s just spent the last 10 mins snorting in my ear, stepping on my head and trying to knock over the glass of water on the bedside table.
Now that I’m well and truly awake, looks like he’s going to settle down. The jerk.
"women shouldn’t have to wear makeup!"
"you don’t have to conform to society’s expectations of feminine aesthetics! "
"women who don’t wear makeup are better; i only like women who look good without makeup; women who wear makeup are fake; etc."